Do YOU Suffer From Good Pussy Syndrome?

GPS, also known as Good Pussy Syndrome, is an epidemic that has spiked in recent years amongst many women across the globe. Symptoms include having men nut fast during sex, turning men into stalkers after sexual intercourse, and having men simply tell you you have good pussy. But studies have shown that GPS is also a symptom of Vaginal Hubris, a condition in which a woman holds her vagina and sexual abilities on a pedestal. After the recent research I’ve conducted, I wanted to share my findings to help other women who are concerned about having this condition.

So, do you suffer from Good Pussy Syndrome? No. No you don’t. Because there is no such thing as good pussy really. It was a concept created by men and women alike to push different agendas on each side. At the center of every woman’s tale of “good pussy” lies the ego, feeding the flames like blood pumping through a beating heart. Women tell men they have good pussy in an attempt to mystify themselves and intrigue them by creating an aura of mystique to draw them in, not realizing that good pussy isn’t gonna keep a man around because to him? All pussy feels like good pussy, truth be told. Especially if it’s new. Men can deny it but they will have sex with anything with a warm hole, I promise you. It’s really pointless and not beneficial for women to constantly go on and on about having good pussy because at that point you’re literally advertising your pussy and your pussy only, then you get mad when that’s all men see you as. You did it to yourself!

On the flip side, men will constantly mention if you have good pussy as a subtle way to hype you up and flatter you, and it works. “Oh he thinks I have good pussy he wants to have sex with me because I’m special! I’m gonna prove it to him! I have power over him, he’s my bitch now!” No mama, he says that to every girl because he knows exactly how to get in them Fenty drawls, because you and damn near every other girl on the dating scene make it too damn easy for them.

Did you know that a child dies every time you open up the Twitter app and type out a tweet that subtly hints to you having good pussy? As soon as you hit send on that tweet, the child’s heart stops beating. PLEASE stop and think of the kids.

“I got good pussy for no reason, I don’t even use this shit 😭”

“Having good pussy is so hard, niggas nut in like 2 seconds 😩”

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Baby could you be any more boring and basic? Do you know how many girls claim to have good pussy? Because by the amount I’ve seen, good pussy is a commodity and nothing special to even brag about. So why are you doing what everyone else is doing, thinking that’s gonna make men perceive you as someone different or special?

How do you know you have good pussy? You magically grew an abnormally long dick somehow and fucked yourself? Ohh right. Some dude told you you have good pussy and you believed him. Of course he said that! He’s feeding your vaginal hubris because he knows you’ll think you have him pussy whipped and women love having that kind of power over men, thinking you have that power is what’s gonna keep you around because now he knows you’re gonna keep having sex with him, it’s just another mindfuck disguised as flattery and if you’re as smart as you think you are you wouldn’t fall for it. Once they stop fucking with you, you go from good pussy to whack pussy because the agenda for them has changed. Having power over men is possible to achieve in a way that actually has an impact and works, cause this ain’t it. I promise.

“Good pussy” is the one thing that makes girls feel special, basic girls that have nothing else remarkable about them. Are you a boring, basic girl? No, you’re not. You’re an interesting and dynamic woman with many sides to her and a winning personality, so maybe start acting like it. I’m tired of the child population dwindling because of y’all. These innocent kids don’t deserve to die because you want to proclaim that your vagina feels like the ocean on a warm summer’s day once a week on twitter so you can garner some attention from your dusty male followers with the “👀” emoji. That emoji is code for “Can I sample it? Ma’am may I PLEASE have some pussy?” Good pussy is not a personality trait or indicator of character by any means but a lot of you sure do treat it like it is and I want you to do better.

At the end of the day, all pussy is good pussy. The playing field is leveled. Stop feeding into this patriarchal BS trying to get a leg up on the next girl, thinking that’s gonna keep your nigga around because it’s not. Cardi B making 50-11 videos about her having “good pussy” because in her mind, Offset knows where home is. How pathetic is that? If we’re gonna run with the good pussy concept, let’s not base it off how how good it can make a man feel or how tamed it can make him. Your pussy does not and should not revolve around a man, period. Men are stupid and fickle creatures, and you’d be just as stupid to base your worth around them in any way.

MY definition of good pussy ain’t even just about the pussy, it’s about YOU as a person too. If you a bomb girl with a bomb personality, you got good pussy. Period. It doesn’t have anything to do with how a nigga feels about you, it has to do with how YOU feel about you. You feel me? I’m not telling you to go the pick-me route and scream from the rooftops about how cool and funny you are and you how you can cook and do this and that though because that’s completely against my religion and politics, and I will hunt you down. And I will laugh at you on Twitter.

What you lot need to start doing is stop being so eager to tell the world that that warm hole between your legs feels like heaven and instead, let your allure speak for itself. No bad bitch in history has ever had to scream from the rooftops that they’re a bad bitch, it’s the same as La Miki Minach calling herself a queen when in reality she acts like a mentally unstable patient from Unsane alongside the Emmy-winning Claire Foy. Sure Rihanna made “Sex With Me” but did she have to? Absolutely not. We been knew Rihanna had good pussy and more because she reeks of sex appeal and will turn a nigga out while ignoring his calls the next day because she has something about her, something that mesmerizes men beyond sex. She’s funny, her confidence is effortless, her gaze is hypnotizing, the list goes on. It don’t even have anything to do with her pussy. 

Your pussy is golden, priceless, Vibranium, an exclusive membership-only club that only the highest caliber of men can get access to and even then, they still need to pass your tests and meet your standards. Stop using good pussy as a coverup for the fact that you’re a boring person and work on becoming someone of substance, the woman of your dreams, a phenomenal woman with DEPTH (and I ain’t talking about that vagina hole).

Cheers to redefining good pussy and not giving a fuck what these broke boys think!